I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
