Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
