He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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