To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I party with great urgency now.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
