I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
