remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
