Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
