shes about as inviting as chlamydia
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
So apparently I’m into choking now
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