talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
My ass is underappreciated
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
