Will you blow on my dice?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
