I CAN MOONWALK!
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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