I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
