Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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