Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
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