I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Randomize
