you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Randomize
