just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
