Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Randomize
