Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
