I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I'm getting married
To pizza
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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