Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
