no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
