I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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