If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Vodka?
Forever.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Randomize