3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Randomize