Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
