Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize