I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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