I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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