She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
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