Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
