Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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