What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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