someone threw a dead crab at me
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Randomize