I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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