My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Randomize
