You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize
