What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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