My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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