their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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