thus making me awesome and them whores
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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