i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
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