she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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