How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
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