She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
