I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
