And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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