Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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