you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
