We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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