Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
