so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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