Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
You made out with two different species that night
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize